Forbidden Love. Why?


A song to share for this post.

Here’s the DL link to the song.
Sang by Kwm Lis song: Ntshav Muag Los Vim Niam Txiv

Why must the elders forbid us to love the one that we want to love? Why must parents forbid us to see them? Can’t they understand that the more they forbid the more we want to go against them? I really don’t understand. Two nights ago, my pop gave my brother the longest lecture about love and his girlfriend all because my brother told my pop that he wanted to go visit his girlfriend for x-mas, just for a day. The thing is that my pop doesn’t really approve of this girlfriend all because he thinks that he’s seen better girls for my brother. Like my brother said, they’re not thinking about marriage or anything, just visiting. So, here is my brother stuck in the kitchen listening to my pop trying to convince my brother to let her go and go for the ones my pop likes. *sigh* Poor brother. Ofcourse i was there defending for him, because the thing is, his girlfriend isn’t that bad at all. i actually like her, because i know her. I mean, it’s been 7 years since they both liked each other and now that they’re to the point where they’re ready for a relationship, my brother finally asked her out. Compare his girlfriend to other girls, she is by far the most, best candidate. Usually hmong girls now a day can’t cook or do work around the house or even go out to people place to help out them when they do hu plig and ua neeb. I admit, i’m just half as bad. She knows all these stuff, and i serously cannot understand why my father can’t see the best of her while the whole family can. It’s not the parents life to decide who to marry, but ourselves. Like i told my pops, would he be responsible if my brother did go and marry the one he likes but ended up not loving her? *sigh* I’m just in shocked that my pop is actually like this, which i would never have guessed that he would be like that. Forbid my brother to lvoe the one he likes, to love the one he wants… *shakes head*😦

After that lecture, my pop finally gave into my brother and told him that he can go for one day and come back, and ofcourse one of my other brothe rhas to go with him. It’ snot a big deal. Oh, and the thign is that his girlfriend lives about two hours away from us, which isn’t that far, but than again, parents…

If my brother and his girlfriend do think about marriage and what ntos, i’ll defend for them and help them in any way i can. seriously, forbidden love is a mistake on the parents side. I believe that if they chose the one they want and really want to marry him or her, go for it. It’s all about decisions and choices. If they happen to make the wrong choice, i hope they learn from that. We make mistakes and we need to learn from it whether it’s the easy way or the hard way. Everyone’s different.

In the hmong culture, these kind of love stories happen a lot! Majority of our movies that are made are about these love stories where the parents forbid their child to lvoe one another and some times it ends tragedy where both side lose. I mean, with all these movies that are made, parents should already get the idea of how things are going to be. Like i stated, the more you forbid, the more the child would go against the words. By all means, love is a very serious feelings. If it gets too strong, it over powers the mind and the body where no one exist except for the one they love. I hope that this generation of hmong would undersatnd and not forbid relationships. It’s their choice, and if they make a bad choice, you’ve done what you can to persuade them out of it. Pom deb dag, siab mam li nqig.